But the short Going Steady doesn't settle for such easy answers. It's the most important decision you'll ever make: should I eat the rest of this BK Stacker, or just trust my vague feeling of nausea and quit while I'm ahead? But put that aside now and let's talk about the third most important decision you'll ever make*: should I go steady? The answer, of course, is no. Mike, Kevin and Bill belly up and tap into As We Like It. Thank goodness As We Like It puts these horrible little busybodies in their place using sound reasoning, gentle persuasion and a few tall frosty ones. (The fact that we didn't make it and shattered four of our teeth in the process is immaterial to the argument.) That we have a beverage that makes encounters with our family almost bearable, enhances our powers of seduction and gives us the courage to jump over a too-high park bench when goaded on by our fun-loving friend. Envious, beady-eyed, sober little creatures who resent that the rest of us have a way to actually have fun playing softball, or going bowling. Balm of hurt minds, great nature's second course, chief nourisher in life's feast! (We think that's what the Swan of Avon was referring to.) Beer provides everything the human body needs-if anything, what little it lacks can be made up with regular doses of loaded potato skins, an occasional pickled egg, or several handfuls of pub mix (if you can get it before the loud guy with Pat Riley hair picks out all the peanuts.) Yes, beer is perfect and holy, but lately it has been maligned by dark forces. They do, however, Understand Your Ideals, and frankly, are very disappointed with how you've turned out.Īh, beer. Why? He is lacking "ideals", which if we understood the short correctly, are like headlights on your car, in that if you accidentally leave them on while you're at work, you have to get a jump from the last guy to leave the building, usually the creepy guy from IT who breathes really loudly in the elevator.Īfter watching this short, Mike, Kevin and Bill are no closer to Understanding Their Ideals. OK, it actually turns out that Jeffrey is just as bad, if not worse, than most of us. How disappointed this young girl will be when she learns she has to take the bus! He had hoped to pick her up in the family car, which is instead speeding towards Grandma's prone, frail person. Specifically, of the girl that he was supposed to take to the dance that night. When Jeffrey hears this tragic news, his first thoughts are not of himself, but instead of others. Like most of us here at RiffTrax, you probably answered "Call an attorney to jump start the inheritance process." Well, this self-centered attitude is what separates regular guys like us from Understanding Your Ideals star Jeffrey Moore. Pop quiz hotshot: Your father tells you that your grandmother has fallen and badly hurt herself. Mike, Kevin and Bill seize Their Chance to Riff! The whole thing makes for an experience that is as surreal as it is hilarious. Surely, the producers of this film were on a higher plane of consciousness, or maybe just really wanted to get off work in time to catch the tail end of happy hour. This may have something to do with the fact that the producers hired an actual street corner derelict to do the raving, or as they refer to it, the "narration." Among the pearls of wisdom he imparts along the way? "Without electricity, there could be no electrical fires." The point is emphasized by showing stock footage of "Pioneers" baling hay. What happens when a public television studio realizes that it has to spend $2,000 of government grant money before Wednesday in order to qualify for full funding for the next fiscal year? You get Your Chance to Live: Technological Failures! Obviously thrown together in a matter of hours, Your Chance to Live rails against modern man's dependence on technology with the vibrant coherency of a raving street corner derelict.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |